Better at Mawita'mk Society: 7 Years in Eskasoni v. 12 Years Here

I had a few good moments in Eskasoni while I was on my own. 7 years in Eskasoni and my only problem was that I couldn't get my full driver's license. I could've gotten a job when I graduated from Eskasoni High School. But I had a few good peaceful moments in my own apartment. I know that people wanted to come and visit but they are addicts and bullies. I have to learn to be patient. I know that if I'd trained for fighting I would have a more formidable enemies. I know that I've wasted my time in Eskasoni because I couldn't get a job. I needed education and I know that I was uneducated for 7 years in Eskasoni.

7 years in Eskasoni and I only had a few good moments in Eskasoni with Rob Shipley and John Robert Doucette. I know that I couldn't of had my own job. I know that I was living in Eskasoni for 7 years without safety, precautions or protections.

I couldn't have my own gaming consoles in my own place. I couldn't have any security or safety in my home. I know that I couldn't enjoy my own apartment in the 7 years I've been in Eskasoni. Throughout my 7 years I've collected pop bottles until 2007. I was threaten to be kicked out of my own apartment I couldn't use how I see fit. I wasn't trusted to take care of my apartment because nobody helped out in those 7 years I have been on my own.

Of course I lived longer in We'koqma'q community. I had a bunch of warm meals three times a day. And had a bunch of good outings and magical moments with Noel and others. There have been a few that have passed away while I was living at Mawita'mk Society. My uncle Richard, my uncle Alex, my cousins Nancy Ann Cremo and Noel Julian. I have been living a rich life at Mawita'mk Society. My grandmother Jessie Denny.

And I had a few milestones to appreciate. I know that I'm safe and sound in We'koqma'q community. I know that I have been through a lot throughout my life in We'koqma'q community. Now in these days I wouldn't risk moving back home because I have so many enemies(Bullies, addicts and fiends). I know that I hadn't any real father who wanted me to get my full driver's license. I feel that my real fathers wanted me to be accustomed, accomplished and thriving in another community. I know that I have been living with Playstation consoles, computer, laptop, tablet, smartphone and eBooks. I know that I had tons of reasons to stay here.

They've patrolled my mind, they've beaten me and humiliated me. I could take more than what they've thrown. But I feel that I could exercise and eat with my Vengeance. I know that I hadn't any reasons for being hireable. I know that I did not meet anyone's criteria.
Anyone's criteria for being hireable. I know Eskasoni demands degrees and job experiences. It's not competitive but elitist in ways. I know that nobody gave me a chance to work. So many are fucked up and dysfunctional in ways where they cannot help. 

They feel embarrassed because helping is shameful. You have to show independence no matter how fucked up you are. I know that I am not well received in ways of being a leader. I know that they want to mess with me and have my place dominated by punks and assholes. I know that I want to have everything I need to live, work, thrive and drive.

Eskasoni doesn't want me to succeed in any ways. I felt trapped, ignorant of their experiences with the outside world. And I know that I don't necessarily want to go back home because not a lot of lovers there, just enemies who want me to rue the day.

Rue the day that I'd met up with them. Nobody wanted me thriving in Eskasoni because everyone didn't straighten out their lives and got better before I left. I know that it had been 7 years and nobody wanted successful and thriving community. I'm pretty much ignorant because my stepfather has held me back from learning what I needed to from books I wanted. I know that it's time now to read and work at understanding my books.

I know that I had previous job experience but I don't think anyone could call it a job. In Eskasoni, for six weeks I had a full time paid internship with a good Custodial training and laboring. I know that I have a bunch of good memories in Eskasoni with my stepfather. Except the bullies wanted me to remember I cannot do anything about them. The thought of reporting it to the police wasn't an option. I know that I don't have any justice at all.

I know that I could buy Sonny a brand new truck if I had my second transplant kidney and job at We'koqma'q Tim Hortons. I know that I have been learning about Retail Council of Canada courses and ISSA-CANADA Cleaning Management Institute's Custodial Technician Training Certificate program. And We'koqma'q Tim Hortons Certificates. I know that I could get my job to work it through educational fund through EI program. I am a Certified Skilled Tradesman and have a lot of mentored experience with plumbing through my stepfather, internet and Black and Decker books.

I know that I looked at the Black and Decker books to study online, what to do. And than use that knowledge to reaffirm it through my stepfather. And learned like that. I know mental health and coping skills, I know a little about nephrology and construction. I know little about listening skills and driving skills.

I know that my family has raised me with knowledge and skills. I know that parenting knowledge isn't my skills. I know that I never struggled with kids. I know that I was always there for my sisters. And I know that I want to improve on my situation by getting a second transplant kidney. That would mean I'm freed from dialysis and I could work. I feel like I have a ton of help in We'koqma'q community. 

I know that I have been living in Eskasoni with hopes to go and get my education, trade and full driver's license. And come back with a bunch of credentials and licenses. I want to be gone for 25 years and have a good life in We'koqma'q community. So far it has been twelve years.

Outside of Eskasoni I want to work on my fitness through the exercises of martial arts, gym and home gym, and calisthenics. I want to be able to embrace my physical aspect of my life.

I know that I have been living in a good place called Mawita'mk Society. They have trained me to be a Craftsman Artisan and a Inventory Clerk. I know that I could do all that and still help out as a General Clerk. I have Construction Trades Labor training and education, which means I am suitable for a good builder, installer, assembler and repair working. I know that I'm happy where I'm at but I know that I could do more. It's just that I'm older than my past first kidney failure. I know that in more trained and can work, drive and live at Mawita'mk Society. Doing stuff for my own mental health is healthy in itself.

In order to feel vibrant zest, I have to build habits of actions and activities. To find what those words mean to me. That is thr self-discipline that I want in my life. The ability to create, build on and sustain habits of actions and activities in fitness, gym and outdoor fitness.

I want to get a good momentum going with the actions of fitness, training hard with weights and my stationary bike. Cycling in a good way. I want to do calisthenics and weight training. I know that I bought a case of weights to get people to exercise with me. I know that I have to exercise every day. I know that I want to have everything I need to live, work and drive. I know that a week's worth of coffees is $2 and something. I know that I have to check the price and I know that I want to build my little gym in Ni'kinen house.

I know that I have a bunch of ways to exercise. Go walking, do weight training, do calisthenics and physically work like an fitness training. I know that I have a lot of good influences. My last purchase will be a Keurig and Tim coffee Keurig pods. I want to explain to my real father I am almost done building up my Ni'kinen house Den Gym. I hope that I could use it well when I do need it.

I just bought a case of weights and that will be my last purchase of weights and fitness. I know that I want to make a last purchase with a Keurig coffee machine and Tim Hortons Coffee Keurig pods. I know that I want to have that in my bedroom. I'm willing to exercise to get on the Transplant kidney list to get my second transplant kidney. I want to do it for me, the ladies and to be in better shape for my own health reasons. To simply be healthier than my previous conditioning. I want to create habits that are full of action and healthy. I want to do it for myself, personally I want to see myself in shape and looking good. I want to have improve mood, improved cardiovascular endurance, respiratory endurance, walking speed endurance, better physical strengths snd muscular endurance.

I want to see how I look as an muscular fit body at Mawita'mk Society.

I want to have all the positive physical muscular fitness in my life where I could lift over a 100 pounds with my dumbbells seating down. And have a chest, arms, shoulders and back of an body-builder. I want to have all I need for my own mind, body and soul. That means I want to build a daily routines of an hour of exercising, chores and hygiene. I want to take baths daily as I work out. I know that fitness training will make my life better here at Mawita'mk Society.

I know that I will want to have a better body. Lean, mean muscles machine. I want to work out until I can lift all my weights from my case of weights. And I want to go for walking after dialysis and until I can do it weekly. I want to reach a fitness level where I could do it monthly and daily. A full day of weight training, calisthenics and walking. That would be a rich life.

I know that I have three meals a day, a good roof over my head and a pretty good understanding of life skills education. I feel that I know the 4 coping skills in DBT Skills Training Manual. I am hoping to read more on it because it's fairly a large book containing information that I could get Certify in, through my BA if I major in psychology. 

I know that I'm not certified in cultural training but I know a thing or two about culture. It should be called traditional training and be immersive learning. They would be much better to cover all the reality of racism they have in their minds. I know that I want to have Certificates in that and learn how effective they really are. 

The 7 years at Eskasoni versus the 12 years I've been here. I feel more happy with what I have because I'm diagnosed paranoid schizophrenic, at Dialysis and have a lot of safe things are Mawita'mk Society. I know that I don't have to go further or be on the hunt for anything of mine. I feel rich with opportunities, safety and goodness in my life. 

I know that I want to stay until I can get my second transplant kidney. I hope that I can get it because I am willing to exercise for it. I know that I want the support of Mawita'mk Society to help me out. I want to exercise with the workers here. I know that I have bought a caseful of weights. With extra dumbbells and curling bar. I hope that I could get something going with them. Whoever is willing.