Struggles of Friendships

There isn't no perfect friendship. There are common dysfunctional friends who want to learn a good way of living. I know that could be achieved through Dialectal Behavioral Therapy techniques and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy techniques, emotional literacy and emotional intelligence. I know that if they need all these coping skills they could practice being emotionally sober and productive. The science of relationship is done by Dr. John Gottman. And I know that Dr. Tian Dayton and Dr. Daniel Goleman are good works of psychology.

I know that I live a psycho-spiritual warrior's life by reading daily philosophies, psychology, history, religion and art. I know that I have a good understanding of Dr. Carl Jung and Dr. Philip Zimbardo's works on psychology. I know that I have tons of reasons to read and understand what they are saying. Addictions Counseling has a wide variety of experiences.

That's experiences in reading and a range of it too. If you want to be good at your job. I know that I have a good understanding because I could figure out, through empathy and sensitivity, how another person might think. I feel like I've been learning about Mi'kmaq history of Treaties, culture, Tradition and spirituality. They have a Two-Eye Seeing philosophy that has been recently made. 

Deceptiveness and perceptiveness is something that requires psychological skills. I feel that people could get information out of me because my defense is down. I don't want to be dependent on older people because I know the life skills teachings, nourishment of my soul and a cultural life experiences.

My knowledge is something like that. It has ranges of generational knowledge and psychology knowledge. Epistemologically I'm pretty smart and have been understanding how this generation cannot understand.

Understanding mental toughness is something that I know because I was an Indigenous descendant nerd who nobody wanted. Everyone seemed to want to knock me off and beat me down. I felt that I wasn't given a chance to recover because I was a child addict that my uncle Dodo wanted to exploit. Or beat down because he wants me to be less of just treated. I know that I have been trying to thrive on my own since I was on my own for 7 years. Refreshing my coping skills and cultural knowledge. I know that I have been learning about opportunities in We'koqma'q community.

Don't mistake I'm glad that I got this much friends in my life. I just need them to read my books. I'm 36 turning 37 years old and I have read most of my books to a good degree and extent. I know that I want to work on romantic relationship and friends. A relationship is a common state of sharing and supporting.

But they mostly talk and appreciate the powers of conversations and talking. Mentally been in many places but emotionally I've been in space. And physically stuck here until I can get my full driver's license. So far with my level of education and employability I have an Unama'ki Driving Certificate and expired Beginner's license. I just hope that Rosie could help out. My brain is haunted with memories and thoughts of what would happen if... I know that I am learning how to motivate and use the life skill Self-discipline.

I know that I have books, encyclopedias, PDFs, printouts, dictionaries, eBooks and magazines to read and enjoy. Everything that my phone could provide I am having it. I know that I have been selected by my sister Billie Jean to share this plan. And buy a new company because I know it's family she trusts. I feel that shit happens and I have to deal with it because I am the older brother.

I have to look for work and start paying it all off. I've been drunk and high before, having an off day little bit. But I know that I've been sober and productive since I got here. I know that I want to learn everything that I can about coping skills, management skills, job-related life skills and survival skills. I know that I have been living here for twelve years and got my ALP diploma, my trade and Unama'ki Driving Certificate. I know that I gotten a few credentials hanging on my wall and I want professional credentials hanging on my wall. I am learning to be healthy in a relationship.

I have Modern Man in Search of a Soul. And I have Kings, Warriors, Magicians and Lovers. Two good books from Dr. Carl Jung. And I haven't completed my collection of that. But I got a few Dr. John Gottman books. I hope that I could get a lot of good books, eBooks and magazines on psychology.

I know that I have been learning a lot about men and women, relationships and romance, dating and coping skills, job-related life skills and survival skills. Strategies for coping and tips too. I feel that I have been learning about psychological works. I was doing pretty good while I was a Transplant kidney patient. I wanted to learn about these things. How certain truths can be interpreted by Two-Eye Seeing philosophy and DBT Skills Training Manual philosophy. Its just a triage of managing losses, barriers, difficulties, grief, tragedies, negligence, ageism, hypergamy, classism, elitism, favoritism, sexism and other things that hold me back.

I've worked to this level of education, employability and license. Hopefully I could continually learn and perfect my driving and work skills. I know that I have been living here for twelve years and I got to this level of independence. I hope that I could keep going.

I know that I want to pick up the habit of cooking and cleaning. I feel that I am getting lazy and original sense of self is changing in ways. I know that I don't get to choose anything I want because older people have that control. I want to be independent and skilled. Trauma does that to you, change who you are and keep on changing the neurons. I know that I've changed many times and learnt many coping skills. I know that I have a loving friendships and caring family. I know that I walk a good red road path because my family knew that I was an on-again and off-again addict.

I know that I had to prove myself in fashion of earning my BA degree, full driver's license and job in We'koqma'q community. I know that I have no privilege here or influences. I hope that I could get my fitness and second transplant kidney. Being independent and tough I am thriving in ways.

My inspirations comes from wanting to understand my biological mother's knowledge. I know that she has read so much and gotten far with her counseling. I know that I have to learn what she has learnt. I felt that I want to be like her curiously wanting to know more. Being a Jown and a Sylliboy, I have to put in the hard work to catch up to my biological mother's level of knowledge. I know that she never once shown any books. Struggles of self-discipline was because I did not have any reason to wake up at 4 am. But she knew to wake up at that time to start her day with aerobics. I know that I've learned emotional intelligence from her and my stepfather.

I know that I have a level of knowledge but I want to keep expanding my mind. I always hope for a good reason to keep working and earning. To grow accustomed to reading and fitness on a evenings.

And to build a really good level of independence where I got my full driver's license, job and credentials, and car. I always have to consider my sisters' family. My stepfather wanted me to be last on the table to get my full driver's license so he could make a big deal about driving me. I know that he is addicted to gambling and I know that he had been essential for my upbringing. I know that I have a good sense of purpose from him and I know that I want to work where he has worked. But apparently I have to be aware of his aversion towards me working.

I haven't the benefits of family helping me out in that regard because they want control over me. I cannot appeased them because they are old and I haven't any woman, car, full driver's license or job. I know that I hope that I could get my BA degree in Cape Breton University. My mother was about strengths, powers and positivity.

She was s light when I needed it. And she was a motherly strengths of such possibilities, openness and intelligence. She was a powerful force of good will and a heck of a Counselor. I had a counselor for a mother. An addiction counselor at that who was at part of the Frontline in medicine, psychopharmcology and counseling. She was the brilliant glue who was creative force and musical dancer to anything. She could make anything danceable and she knew how to do stuff to have such mindfulness. She kept a good eye on me because I was a child addict.

She knew that me and my stepfather had a good connection. She knew how to create moments of teachings, good feelings and a good understanding. She was sharp and had her breaks. I only known her for 9 years of my life. And I knew that she was impactful with taking the good with the bad. I knew that I wanted to be like her.

Confident, intelligent, powerful and a motherly strength that I never could find again. She was, in my short lifetime a positive understanding person. She was getting her life together and she was starting to get her Bachelor degree in social work. Obviously she had something in mind with her counseling skills. I know that I wanted to get my Bachelor of Arts. And major in psychology. And then go for my Bachelor of Social Work. That was my plan right from the beginning.

But my birthday is coming up and through Mawita'mk Society I'm getting my birthday gifts. I know that I am getting Star Trek: Picard season one and season two. Hopefully this will reach further than the Simpsons. And reaching further than Roseann and The Big Bang Theory. I know that I want Star Trek: Picard to run far and have a range and depth to it that I know it's really good writing. I feel that I had BBT collecting for years.

I remember counting the months of being sober. I was kind of suicidal and I wanted to throw away my life if it wasn't for Andrea Currie and Candice Sylliboy. I wouldn't of made it because I was such traumatized. I felt that I wanted to learn how to keep living at Mawita'mk Society. How Darren and Candice were the fun ones driving and playing music. How I was slowly accepting my damnations and recovery. I don't have a perfect life and I know that hypersexual thoughts and insecurities haunted me. I know that women in my world didn't want it. Nobody wanted me because I am such a loser.

I may not have the extreme luck of having different girls every night but I know that I'm still learning about the sciences of relationships, emotional literacy of a good relationship, emotional attunement and interpersonal effectiveness of a relationship.

As I grow personally I am learning the emotional intelligence of my relationships and friendships. People hide stuff from me and I know that I'm not that keen in thinking and figuring out things. I could enjoy their presence and enjoy their support. But I felt like today Darren has changed a lot and I don't know when he has change. But it's something of a good change. And I know that I haven't been corrected in my thinking since Candice.

But Shauna is doing pretty good. She just got to know history and hopefully I could get on the right thinking for things. I know that I haven't been able to get what I wanted out of this damned Island. Or country. But I am an experienced bachelor in sexuality. And I know things that could help Mawita'mk Society to build a small garage. I hope that I could learn carpentry because I want to see if I understand building principles.

There isn't any perfect friendships but there is common dysfunctional friendships. But that don't mean we cannot learn how to be soberly productive, coping and having emotional intelligence. We are learning emotional literacy and emotional intelligence from friendships, family relationships and cousins. I feel that I have been learning how important these kinds of relationships are in my life. I know that practicing emotional literacy in my own relationships. I could learn how I truly feel. But I know that I have anger because I've witnessed a lot in my young life. And been exposed in my young life.

My first recovery I'd learned the importance of moving on. My adult friends and family have guided me to that. And I know that I wanted vengeance and Reconciliation. I felt trapped in my life because everyone has been doing it. I know that I have been exposed to addictions, hypersexuality, discriminations.

My uncles have helped out to show me my ranges and depths of my own mind. I know that they are cruel in finding the truth but they are bad ass to make it up. I know that I have been living at Mawita'mk Society for twelve years and a lot of changes happened over the years. I know that I did get to have experienced life in ways. And I know that I want to have everything I need to live my life in a sober, culturally and psycho-spiritually relevant ways and productively. I hope that I could get something going for my own theories and schooling.

The struggles of friendship is keeping interested or entertained. I know through the powers of conversations they have taught me a lot. I feel that I had a good time with my friends and family. But I don't want to get into deeper problems. I know that they have addictions too. And in that the list of my problems I'm working on.